Overcoming Our Limiting Beliefs About Discipleship
As Christians, we most often use the word “belief” in connection to our faith and the Bible, but we also have beliefs that shape our lives connected to pretty much every action or inaction in life. Sometimes these beliefs can limit our potential.
In this episode of the Everyday Disciple Podcast, we’ll talk about how you can identify and replace your limiting beliefs about discipleship and mission. It’s time to start moving forward!
In This Episode You’ll Learn:
- How to recognize and name any limiting beliefs you have.
- How to identify excuses or perceived barriers that keep you stuck.
- Ways to explore your unmet spiritual desires.
- Who you need to spend more time with to promote the changes you want.
From this episode:
“God’s desire is that you would live with spiritual freedom and relational peace. This is what Jesus came to model for us and then commanded his disciples (that’s us today) to go and live the same way, making more disciples. He has placed his own Holy Spirit within in you and not given you a spirit of fear or limitations. Don’t let your limiting beliefs or fears or dead traditions stop you from embracing the life that Jesus died to give you.“
Each week the Big 3 will give you immediate action steps to get you started.
Download today’s BIG 3 right now. Read and think over them again later. You might even want to share them with others…
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Links and Resources Mentioned in This Episode:
Coaching with Caesar and Tina in discipleship and missional living.
Get Caesar’s latest book: Bigger Gospel for FREE… Click Here
Transcript
If you feel unsure, or ill equipped, or maybe unskilled at disciple making, you really can change your limiting beliefs and become someone confidently, skillfully leads others to spiritual freedom.
Caesar Kalinowski:and Relational Peace in Christ.
Caesar Kalinowski:You really can make disciples of Jesus and you can create a culture of discipleship that others will embrace and thrive in too.
Caesar Kalinowski:I gotta be honest, changing our beliefs and how you see things is not always easy.
Caesar Kalinowski:All progress though starts with the truth.
Caesar Kalinowski:So, start by looking at what your current beliefs about discipleship and mission are.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe we'll uncover some lies in the process.
Heath Hollensbe:Welcome to the Everyday Disciple Podcast, where you'll learn how to live with greater intentionality and an integrated faith that naturally fits into every area of life.
Heath Hollensbe:In other words, discipleship as a lifestyle.
Heath Hollensbe:This is the stuff your parents, pastors, and seminary professors probably forgot to tell you.
Heath Hollensbe:And now, here's your host, Caesar Kalinowski.
Heath Hollensbe:Thank you.
Caesar Kalinowski:How's it going?
Caesar Kalinowski:I hope you're having a good week.
Caesar Kalinowski:I am.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'm just getting ready to head off to a couples retreat in Tennessee.
Caesar Kalinowski:Just a handful of couples that we have with us in coaching.
Caesar Kalinowski:And we're going to kind of live like a missional community for a week and have some fun and some food and some fishing.
Caesar Kalinowski:I like that assonance, huh?
Caesar Kalinowski:Fun, food, fishing.
Caesar Kalinowski:And, uh, I hope to catch some fish this year.
Caesar Kalinowski:So, Tim, if you're listening, brother, I hope that works out.
Caesar Kalinowski:Uh, we had a blast last year doing the same thing, but didn't catch any fish.
Caesar Kalinowski:Uh, we'll have some, uh, time for hiking, I'm guessing, and we'll be doing the story of God.
Caesar Kalinowski:What a blast that is.
Caesar Kalinowski:We did this last May.
Caesar Kalinowski:And it really marked the year for all of us.
Caesar Kalinowski:It was a very special time.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe you'll join us next year.
Caesar Kalinowski:Hey, speaking of joining us, have you joined us over on Facebook and the Everyday Disciple Facebook group?
Caesar Kalinowski:I hope you will just head on over to Facebook, put in Everyday Disciple.
Caesar Kalinowski:And podcast or whatever you'll find us.
Caesar Kalinowski:Or you can go to everyday disciple.com/facebook and it'll just take you there.
Caesar Kalinowski:All right, so and by the way, I hope you're sharing the show with others.
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you doing that?
Caesar Kalinowski:That's how people find new podcasts.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number one way, all the data and research shows that number one way people find new podcasts is someone they know says, oh, I was just listening to this.
Caesar Kalinowski:You would dig it and they share it with 'em.
Caesar Kalinowski:Would you do that?
Caesar Kalinowski:Would you, someone you love, people in your missional community, how about.
Caesar Kalinowski:All the folks in your church, throw it in the church newsletter or on your Facebook page or whatever, just let 'em know about the Everyday Disciple podcast.
Caesar Kalinowski:You can send 'em right over to everyday disciple.com/podcast, or you can send 'em to everyday disciple.com period and they'll find it.
Caesar Kalinowski:It's right there.
Caesar Kalinowski:Before we get started, I wanna thank our.
Caesar Kalinowski:Supporters at Missio Publishing, they are the best, and I believe that they are still producing the very best disciple making and missional resources that are available out there.
Caesar Kalinowski:I've talked about several of them in the past, the Gospel Primer, Tangible Kingdom Primer, the stuff by Alan Hirsch, Hugh Halter, there's so many good things there.
Caesar Kalinowski:Check it out, go to missiopublishing.
Caesar Kalinowski:com, scroll through, see what different books are available, different types of resources.
Caesar Kalinowski:I think you'll be glad you did.
Caesar Kalinowski:Now, I was originally going to talk about dealing with limiting beliefs about discipleship a few episodes back, but a couple other topics seemed a little more timely to me.
Caesar Kalinowski:So, I just made the call and I postponed it till today and I'm excited to talk about this with you.
Caesar Kalinowski:As Christians, we most often use the word belief in connection to our faith and the Bible, but we also have beliefs that shape our lives connected to pretty much every action or inaction in our lives.
Caesar Kalinowski:A belief is an assumption that we have about ourselves or something in our life and how it operates.
Caesar Kalinowski:And those beliefs have usually been created and distorted and made up essentially from the experiences that we've had in our life.
Caesar Kalinowski:And they're usually formed at an early age or along the way and they've been a part of our life, maybe our whole life.
Caesar Kalinowski:They don't even feel like options.
Caesar Kalinowski:They just feel like the way it is.
Caesar Kalinowski:Some of those beliefs may have even contributed to some of the success that we've experienced in the past.
Caesar Kalinowski:But at a certain point, they no longer service as well.
Caesar Kalinowski:It's not the same.
Caesar Kalinowski:Things have changed, but we're still clinging to those, maybe old or false, limiting beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:We can form beliefs that limit us, or keep us plateaued, or stuck in some area of our life.
Caesar Kalinowski:Often what we believe, and seem certain of, it's actually wrong, or we're not as right as we think we are.
Caesar Kalinowski:When this is the case, these beliefs limit our experiences.
Caesar Kalinowski:and our potential.
Caesar Kalinowski:That's what I want to talk about.
Caesar Kalinowski:Think about this.
Caesar Kalinowski:I sit down in a chair if I believe that it will hold me, but I won't sit in a chair if I believe it will not hold me.
Caesar Kalinowski:That's how our beliefs are.
Caesar Kalinowski:We proceed forward and do the things we do in life based on what we believe.
Caesar Kalinowski:And when people are stuck, it's rarely due to a lack of knowledge.
Caesar Kalinowski:Although sometimes that's true.
Caesar Kalinowski:Usually, they've reached the furthest horizon of what they can envision or embrace for themselves.
Caesar Kalinowski:Essentially, they've arrived at the limits of how they see themselves being and what that would lead them to do.
Caesar Kalinowski:What we believe about ourselves always leads to what we ultimately do.
Caesar Kalinowski:Let's talk about dealing with our limiting beliefs about discipleship and mission.
Caesar Kalinowski:When it comes to discipleship as a lifestyle and leading others to truly embrace the mission of God.
Caesar Kalinowski:I've often believed more in a new vision and future than the folks I'm coaching actually believe for themselves.
Caesar Kalinowski:Sure, they want it, but often they doubt it could ever be a reality for them or their church.
Caesar Kalinowski:When things are new or seem tough, it can be easy to lose faith.
Caesar Kalinowski:And that's why I've often had to have faith for them.
Caesar Kalinowski:I have to loan them the faith I have from the experience and success in making disciples that God's given me.
Caesar Kalinowski:God's given us.
Caesar Kalinowski:So let me start out this journey today with you by loaning you some faith.
Caesar Kalinowski:If you feel unsure or ill equipped or maybe unskilled at disciple making, you really can change your limiting beliefs and become someone who confidently, skillfully leads others to spiritual freedom and relational peace in Christ.
Caesar Kalinowski:You really can make disciples of Jesus, and you can create a culture of discipleship that others will embrace and thrive in too.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'm loaning you the faith.
Caesar Kalinowski:Now I gotta be honest, changing our beliefs and how you see things is not always easy.
Caesar Kalinowski:All progress though starts with the truth.
Caesar Kalinowski:So start by looking at what your current beliefs about discipleship and mission are.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe we'll uncover some lies in the process.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'm going to give you some help here.
Caesar Kalinowski:And I have to thank Christian Montaigne for his great thoughts that have massively helped me understand how to begin to identify and change my own limiting beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:Okay, so first, we've got to recognize the limiting belief.
Caesar Kalinowski:And that's not always easy to see our own limiting beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:It's a little like looking at the back of your own head.
Caesar Kalinowski:But, here are a few things that have helped me.
Caesar Kalinowski:Start by looking at the results that you're getting in your life right now in the area of discipleship.
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you happy with how things are going and how your people are engaging?
Caesar Kalinowski:Are there consistent recurring themes, excuses, or perceived barriers that you keep hearing or using?
Caesar Kalinowski:There's a really good chance that you've embraced some of these things now as a limiting belief.
Caesar Kalinowski:Some of the things I hear all the time that are absolutely not true But our common limiting beliefs are things like discipleship's done in a series of classes, you know, like 101, 201, whatever.
Caesar Kalinowski:And that's the way it's always been done.
Caesar Kalinowski:Or I hear our people just don't care that much about making disciples.
Caesar Kalinowski:They all checked the Jesus in my heart box years ago and now they're just waiting to go to heaven.
Caesar Kalinowski:They don't want to live this way.
Caesar Kalinowski:Or I'll hear things like My house is not big enough to have people over all the time.
Caesar Kalinowski:My neighbors aren't even really interested in coming over.
Caesar Kalinowski:I hear things like this, I'm too introverted.
Caesar Kalinowski:Yeah, I'm too introverted to be making disciples and community.
Caesar Kalinowski:Or I'll hear my people do not have the time in their schedules for discipleship and outreach and mission.
Caesar Kalinowski:Or flip that around.
Caesar Kalinowski:I've heard this a lot of times, I don't have time to truly make disciples and community.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'm too busy with my ministry duties.
Caesar Kalinowski:Is that true, Pastor?
Caesar Kalinowski:Or I'll hear, I don't have the knowledge or the tools to do this.
Caesar Kalinowski:To that I say, well, you could have.
Caesar Kalinowski:But here's the thing.
Caesar Kalinowski:None of those things that I just listed off are actually true.
Caesar Kalinowski:If things like that are keeping you or others from making disciples as a primary focus of your lives, these are false and limiting beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you willing to explore your limiting beliefs and then name them?
Caesar Kalinowski:That's important.
Caesar Kalinowski:That's the beginning of change.
Caesar Kalinowski:Next, explore your unmet desires.
Caesar Kalinowski:What is a strong unmet desire in your life when it comes to making disciples of Jesus and truly living out your faith with others and community?
Caesar Kalinowski:In everyday life, you know, with your family, your kids, close friends and neighbors, do you have any unmet desires there?
Caesar Kalinowski:If you feel like you're not gaining traction towards that desire, reflect on what the major doubts or fears are that surround it for you.
Caesar Kalinowski:Those doubts or fears are reflections of your limiting beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:Don't miss that.
Caesar Kalinowski:Those doubts or fears are reflections of your limiting beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:Now, sometimes it's helpful to ask others for two reasons.
Caesar Kalinowski:Others often see something that we don't see.
Caesar Kalinowski:You might ask people like, Hey, do you see how we're not really making disciples here or not living this as a lifestyle?
Caesar Kalinowski:What do you see in my life that's keeping us from that?
Caesar Kalinowski:Or do you think I'm keeping us from that?
Caesar Kalinowski:Or do you hear me making excuses?
Caesar Kalinowski:Ask others for help.
Caesar Kalinowski:And secondly, others can provide an external validation that it's actually alright for this belief to change.
Caesar Kalinowski:You know what I mean?
Caesar Kalinowski:They can help us identify some of our limiting beliefs, but they can also validate it's okay to change that.
Caesar Kalinowski:No, we don't have to stay stuck there.
Caesar Kalinowski:Now second, describe the new, better belief that you want.
Caesar Kalinowski:Because you can't just discard an old belief usually without replacing it with a new one.
Caesar Kalinowski:And this is often a gradual and developing process.
Caesar Kalinowski:The vision doesn't always just spring out fully formed.
Caesar Kalinowski:It often needs to grow.
Caesar Kalinowski:and you experience a little success and then you grow some more.
Caesar Kalinowski:What would be a new, better belief about discipleship and leading others as a lifestyle into this?
Caesar Kalinowski:What do you think?
Caesar Kalinowski:What would be a new, better belief about discipleship?
Caesar Kalinowski:Give yourself a specific direction to start growing towards.
Caesar Kalinowski:And here's a tip.
Caesar Kalinowski:Take courageous action, but do it in short sprints towards these new beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:Don't go for the full, immediate overhaul.
Caesar Kalinowski:Replace one limiting belief at a time and put great effort into the new, better belief and helping others do the same.
Caesar Kalinowski:I think that'll help.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number three, be honest.
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you willing to do what you've never done to experience what you've never experienced?
Caesar Kalinowski:Change is hard and it often involves facing our fears.
Caesar Kalinowski:But the path to a better future is rarely as difficult as our imagination makes it out to be.
Caesar Kalinowski:Yeah, there's boogeymen hiding all over the place, but they're not real, just turn on the light.
Caesar Kalinowski:What will this change be worth to you?
Caesar Kalinowski:What would make it worth it for you?
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you truly willing to try that?
Caesar Kalinowski:I had a good friend who was a senior pastor at a church, and it was a pretty old fundamental church, and his elders and old time stakeholders, according to him, were against everything.
Caesar Kalinowski:He was trying to move towards missional, and everything we were suggesting and training and coaching towards, it's just, oh, all these old timers, they're just against everything.
Caesar Kalinowski:Until he started to change his beliefs about some things and try some new things.
Caesar Kalinowski:He started inviting the elders as couples over for dinner and said, no shop talk.
Caesar Kalinowski:We're just going to hang out and get to be, be a family.
Caesar Kalinowski:And they started building deeper relationships.
Caesar Kalinowski:And out of that, he invited them all as couples to go through the gospel primer together over eight weeks.
Caesar Kalinowski:They spent eight weeks, a little bit each day, getting together once a week, going deeper into the implications of the gospel and what it looks like to live it out in community.
Caesar Kalinowski:And they all loved it.
Caesar Kalinowski:See, originally he had a limiting belief that they're the ones that are against everything and actually it was just a small voice here or there, it wasn't true, but it was limiting.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number four, what environments or events trigger your limiting beliefs?
Caesar Kalinowski:Identify your triggers, those things that seem to provoke your limiting beliefs to pop up and take over and stall you from moving forward.
Caesar Kalinowski:If you can remove or limit your exposure to negative triggers, and sometimes that's certain people, you then do so.
Caesar Kalinowski:But mostly just be aware of the things that trigger you and cause you to shrink back and not move forward in creating a culture of discipleship and a lifestyle for yourself and your family.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number five, get some help.
Caesar Kalinowski:It's difficult but not impossible but it's hard to change on your own.
Caesar Kalinowski:For most people it's much faster and easier to do this with help from others.
Caesar Kalinowski:Here are some examples that I got from Christian Montaigne again might help.
Caesar Kalinowski:He uses this word.
Caesar Kalinowski:He says, soak yourself in some relational marinade.
Caesar Kalinowski:I like that.
Caesar Kalinowski:Immerse yourself in relationships with people who think and act like you want to think and act.
Caesar Kalinowski:Befriend some successful disciple makers, people that are living this out as a lifestyle.
Caesar Kalinowski:Spend time with people in missional communities.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe join a peer network with others who are making or who have made the shifts.
Caesar Kalinowski:that you want to make.
Caesar Kalinowski:And then he goes on and says, also, there's a way to help soak yourself in some mental marinade.
Caesar Kalinowski:Immerse yourself in podcasts and books and workshops or whatever else best reflects what you're trying to be and do.
Caesar Kalinowski:Exposing yourself to these types of patterns of thinking and attitudes kind of start to shape our own hearts.
Caesar Kalinowski:And this is maybe the best kind of help is get a mentor or hire a coach.
Caesar Kalinowski:Bring people into your life for the express purpose of asking them to help you grow in this area of life and ministry.
Caesar Kalinowski:Don't just Frankenstein bolt things together and go it alone and keep letting your limiting beliefs keep you from it.
Caesar Kalinowski:Personally, I'm nearly always working with at least one coach in my life, in some area that I'm trying to improve in.
Caesar Kalinowski:And I've invested a lot in coaching and training to be and do the things that we believe we're called to.
Caesar Kalinowski:See, I only have one life, and I need accountability sometimes to change and get to action.
Caesar Kalinowski:Because I want to spend more time living a lifestyle of discipleship and mission than and less time trying to figure out how to do it.
Caesar Kalinowski:Those you lead and the community around you will all benefit from your pursuit of growth in this.
Caesar Kalinowski:And I want to encourage you, don't leave your future or your potential to chance.
Caesar Kalinowski:Take this seriously and take action.
Caesar Kalinowski:Remember, I'm loaning you the faith to get started.
Caesar Kalinowski:And I'm here for you if you want help.
Caesar Kalinowski:If that's me and I can help, great.
Caesar Kalinowski:If you want to start moving past your limiting beliefs about discipleship and mission as a lifestyle, If you wanna get a full framework for discipleship and mission, and some help implementing that, well, can I invite you to check out the coaching that we offer?
Caesar Kalinowski:Head on over to everydaydisciple.
Caesar Kalinowski:com forward slash coaching.
Caesar Kalinowski:There's a lot of information there, and there's a way to sign up, and we can hop on a Zoom call if you'd like, and I'm happy to answer any questions you have.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe you're not ready for that, and you just wanna talk.
Caesar Kalinowski:You got some questions you'd just like to ask me.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'm happy to.
Caesar Kalinowski:Now, let's get to the big three takeaways from today's topic.
Caesar Kalinowski:If nothing else, I want you to have these.
Caesar Kalinowski:Don't want you to miss them.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe you're out walking or riding in the car or something else, can't write them down.
Caesar Kalinowski:I've done that for you.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'll send you a printable PDF of this week's big three as a free download by going to everydaydisciple.
Caesar Kalinowski:com forward slash big three.
Caesar Kalinowski:Here's the big three for this week.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number one, Start by looking at the results that you're getting in your life right now in the area of discipleship.
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you happy with how things are going and how your people are engaging?
Caesar Kalinowski:Are there any consistent recurring themes, excuses, or perceived barriers that you keep hearing or using yourself?
Caesar Kalinowski:There's a really good chance that you've embraced some of these things as a limiting belief.
Caesar Kalinowski:Name them and start to replace them with better beliefs.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number two, God's desire is that you would live with spiritual freedom and relational peace.
Caesar Kalinowski:This is what Jesus came to model for us and then commanded his disciples, that's us today, to go and live the same way, making more disciples.
Caesar Kalinowski:He's placed his own Holy Spirit within you and not giving you a spirit of fear or limitation.
Caesar Kalinowski:Don't let your limiting beliefs or fears or dead traditions stop you from embracing the life that Jesus died to give you.
Caesar Kalinowski:Number three, immerse yourself in relationships with people who think and act like you want to think and act.
Caesar Kalinowski:Get into a peer network with some others who are making or who have made the shifts that you want to make.
Caesar Kalinowski:Immerse yourself in podcasts and books and workshops and whatever else that best reflects what you're trying to be and do.
Caesar Kalinowski:Because exposing yourself to this new thinking and attitudes, that starts to shape your own.
Caesar Kalinowski:And I encourage you to be proactive and get a mentor or coach and ask them to help you grow in making disciples in this area of your life.
Caesar Kalinowski:and ministry.
Caesar Kalinowski:And if that's us, if we can help with that, great.
Caesar Kalinowski:Again, just at least check out the coaching that we offer over everydaydisciple.
Caesar Kalinowski:com forward slash coaching.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'd love to at least talk with you.
Caesar Kalinowski:Maybe we can help.
Caesar Kalinowski:All right.
Caesar Kalinowski:Well, time's up today.
Caesar Kalinowski:I hope you'll join me next week.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'll be asking the question.
Caesar Kalinowski:Are you believing what God says about you?
Caesar Kalinowski:And I'll be joined by author, an amazing speaker and disciple maker, Joe Saxton.
Caesar Kalinowski:You won't wanna miss it.
Caesar Kalinowski:I'll talk to you soon.
Heath Hollensbe:Thanks for joining us today.
Heath Hollensbe:For more information on this show and to get loads of free discipleship resources, visit everyday disciple.com.
Heath Hollensbe:And remember, you really can live with the spiritual freedom and relational peace that Jesus promised every day.